8 May 44 BCE: To Atticus (at Rome) from Cicero (at Pompeii)
A letter from Brutus has made Cicero less hopeful. And Dolabella owes him money
On May 7th, in my Pompeian villa, I received two letters from you, one dated six days ago, and the other four. So I will come to the earlier one first. I am glad that Barnaeus delivered my letter to you in time! See to it with Cassius, as always. How convenient it is that I had done exactly what you advise four days previous: I wrote to him and sent you a copy of my letter. But when Dolabella’s aristeia1—as that’s how you wrote about it to me—had renewed my hope, suddenly, letters from you and Brutus! He says that he is thinking on exile. I however see a different harbour, and one better suited to my age; although I would truly prefer to be carried there with Brutus flourishing and the Republic already restored.2 But now, as you write, there is no choice in the matter. For you agree with me that at our age, we must shrink away from soldiery, especially in civil war.
Mark Antony has replied to me about Cloelius, saying only that he is grateful for my lenience and clemency, and that I shall find it a great source of delight. But Pansa seems in a rage about Cloelius, and similarly about Deiotarus, and he speaks harshly, if you choose to believe him. However, what’s not great (as I see it at least) is that he disapproves vehemently of what Dolabella has done.
About the garlands, when your sister’s son was accused by his father, he wrote back that he had worn a garland in honour of Caesar, he had put it aside in mourning; finally, that he is perfectly willing to be reviled for loving Caesar even when dead.
I have written to Dolabella carefully, in the way you said I should. I also wrote to Sicca. I don’t put the burden of doing this on you—I don’t want him to have a grudge against you. I recognise Servius’ way of speaking, in which I find there is more fear than good counsel. But since we are all terrified, I agree with Servius.
Publilius is playing tricks on you. For Caerellia has been despatched as legate to me here by that lot—I easily persuaded her that what she was asking was neither possible nor agreeable. If I see Antony I will make the case for Buthrotum meticulously.
I come to your more recent letter, although I have now already replied about Servius. You say I am ‘making a big deal out of Dolabella’s action.’ By Hercules, it does seem that way to me, that nothing greater was possible in such circumstances and at such a time. Yet whatever credit I have him, I give only because of the content of your letters. I definitely agree with you that it would be a greater exaction if he paid me what he owes me.3 I wish Brutus would stay at Astura.
You praise me, for making no decision about leaving for Greece until I see how things turn out—but I am changing my mind. But I won’t come to any decision before I see you. I am glad that my dear Attica thanks me with regard to her mother; I handed the whole villa and the stores over to her, and plan to see her on the 11th. Wish Attica well from me. I shall take good care of Pilia.
Read Ad Atticum 14.19 in Latin here | Check the glossary here
The ‘harbour’ he is thinking of is death.
Cicero jokingly uses the word πρᾶξις twice in relation to Dolabella in this paragraph. It can mean both ‘action’ and ‘exaction of money.’